Lunch at the Happy Elf Homeschool

Mom got some trays at the thrift store. I have some children who are very happy that some foods are not touching other foods. Yeah. Woodjie had a bowl of leftover dry cereal and some pretzels and other non-milk-and-egg things. Elf says that the trays look like happy faces. :]

Wordless.

I posted a bit ago about how I rather dislike the whole Christmas season as a secular package. The whole purchasing season and the obligations, I felt, can detract from the message.

Woodjie is teaching me something different. He loves the Christmas lights, even if he doesn't understand the "message." He LOVES the Christmas lights. HE LOVES THE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS!!! He's jumping up and down, waving his arms about and screaming happy about the Christmas lights. I've just got to hold him sometimes and bring him over by the tree to feel him just shake head-to-toe with glee. His little smile. His bright blue eyes.

Did you know he wakes up giving kisses? Did anyone ever know *extreme* joy before he demonstrated it?

You know, I don't worry too much about teaching doctrine to this one yet. Even "Jesus loves me, this I know" might not be getting through. He has a "pray" PEC and he has learned to be silent for just a moment while the blessing is spoken. Is he really praying over his food? I highly doubt it. I used to worry a bit about how that would effect his "walk with God" until I realized... most of us aren't really praying, either. Not really.

I'm not sure how well-connected he's going to be with God as he grows. I know that it's hard enough to present the idea of "no" to him, and the whys behind it. Sin as a concept is a bit beyond that yet still. He's nowhere near understanding that. Is he going to be saved? Not saved? Is there any sort of doctrinal third category into which one heaps the assorted disabled people? Sort of like the "wheelchair" symbol. It's kinda sexless and nondescript. It could be anybody who doesn't fit the "male or female" model. The handicapped? They're almost like a third sex or a third classification of person, pictographically.

No, I don't think that about Woodjie. He's a boy. He's a toddler. He likes doing boy and toddler things. But sometimes I do understand why some organizations use the puzzle piece to symbolize the autistic person. Do they fit? Not fit? Do we say they fit, but they really don't fit? I find myself going back over the Bible and trying to figure out what God has to say about teaching this particular child.

And I'm really finding nothing.

I mean, yeah. Good precepts about "train up a child in the way he should go" and yeah yeah yeah lots of vague generalities. But nothing about "how to make God clear to a non-verbal person" or "how to integrate the people God chooses not to heal for the present moment into worship services." Or anything like that. Or even a MENTION of a non-verbal autistic type person. There were deaf and mute but not people who could hear perfectly well and still didn't speak. Nobody like Woodjie.

Our church has very kind volunteers who genuinely care for Woodjie. They are kind to him, even though he can be difficult to care for. At the same time... I'm reading through the church membership packet and realizing Woodjie will NEVER be a member. He cannot "declare" his faith in Christ. He doesn't even understand the words "faith" or "Christ." Guess he's doomed to Hell.

Crap, that is so not funny. That was me crying while I typed that, ok? And you know, browsing the denominational website, I see all kinds of things about the disabled being a part of the church and how it's important to incorporate them into our family. But Woodjie does not speak. He does not write. He will never be a member on paper, someone considered "one of us" on the church rolls.

Part of me really gets that differentiation. One fellow at the membership meeting quipped that God sure isn't going to be checking our membership cards at the door. And he's right! Then again, the church (you know, the ORGANIZATION, not necessarily the Church, the body of Christ... get a Venn diagram and see there are some that are both, some and/or) shouldn't open itself up to let anyone in to teach its children without some basic agreements on "this we believe." I see both sides of that argument.

But I'm left back where I started. I'm left with this "puzzle piece." I am realizing that it is not a piece at all, but a complete work of God, a reflection of His very image. A wordless reflection, given to me for a season to love and raise.

I am wordless myself, typing this.

Dick Cheney in 2012!

HolyCoast blog has some funnies in this post with slogans for Dick Cheney in 2012.

“I shoot my friends in the face with a shotgun. What do you think I’ll do to America’s enemies?”
“I’m what the Mayans predicted.”
“The only time I’ll bow before a foreign leader is in preparation for an uppercut.”
“I already control everything; let’s just make it official.”
“If I’m busy being president, I won’t have time to eat your children’s souls.”
“Probably not going to win a Nobel Peace Prize.”
“You don’t inaugurate me; you unleash me.”

Check out Rick's blog for insights into politics and life.

In My Inbox: Merry Christmas, Ya NAZI!

AFA wrote me and a zillion other people an email quoting a Gap ad:

"Two, Four, Six, Eight, now's the time to liberate
Go Christmas, Go Hanukkah, Go Kwanza, Go Solstice.
Go classic tree, go plastic tree, go plant a tree, go add a tree,
You 86 the rules, you do what feels just right.
Happy do whatever you wanukkah, and to all a cheery night.
Go Christmas, Go Hanukkah, go whatever holiday you wanukkah."

"Did you notice it?" AFA President Tim Wildmon asks. "Gap compares Christmas to the pagan holiday called 'Solstice.' Solstice is celebrated by Wiccans who practice witchcraft!" Enclosed was a button for supposedly outraged people like me to click to return a "survey" to the organization. In closing, I was told about how very important it was for me to forward this email to ALL my family and friends. Nevermind that most of 'em are secular liberals who would probably laugh before hitting the "delete" button.

Though I've got to say that even the little quote from the Gap ad bothers me in that it implies that all holidays are the same. But I happ

Ohh, my word. I'm just stopping there. Everything I type after this point is just coloured by what I just got in an email... As I started typing this post... what should happen but I received another email linking the anti-Christmas crowd to the Nazis. No, really. Read it. It defies imagination. I'm going to tell D that maybe the money we've been giving these people should go elsewhere next year. I'm sorry to say that my funds (and, like, many other people's) helped produce this:

"The Nazis hated Christmas for one simple reason: it celebrates the birth of a Jew. By the way, this suggests a new tack in our discussion about Christmas. The left hates Christmas because it celebrates the birthday of the first Christian. But isn't there something faintly anti-Semitic about that?"

YOWIE!! So... GOD INCARNATE is a "Christian?" I thought a Christian was one who recognized that he's a sinner (Jesus, the sinner?) and has repented of such (Jesus, repented??) and turned to God's Son for forgiveness because of His atoning death on the cross (Ok, that would be soooo circular...) and etc. etc. You get my point. The doctrine there is so wonky that no way they can point fingers at the secular Gap company.

So anyway, if you don't like Christmas, you're not just a conscientious objector fellow Christian who doesn't think the season as celebrated is entirely Godly... YOU'RE A NAZI!! Wow. SOMEONE is gonna boot me in the comment section with a big goose step, but ohhh well. I don't mind glorifying God through the Christmas holidays because God OWNS ALL THE SEASONS, and I don't mind the lights and the trees, and I don't mind the presents, but let's not kid ourselves about the real "rea$on for the $ea$on" when shopkeepers run an ad. I mean, how many Ash Wednesday super-saver specials are there in YOUR local newspaper fliers each year?

I'm coming out of the closet on this one. Here's where the stones are really going to start flying: if it were completely up to me, there would not be any Christmas. I think it confuses people into thinking Jesus was born in December, and people get entirely too wrapped up in the present thing (ha ha). Not to mention that I have no clue about the proper etiquette and equivalent gift-giving and receiving. I'd rather just use Christmas as the "annual send out and receive a card" holiday and forget the expectations and the presents. Pressure off. D has put his foot down on that in the past, though. Yes, the children have to have presents and now, thanks to our generous neighbour, we have a tree and lights and everything. I think they might have thought us too poor to go buy a tree, and I didn't tell them the reason we never had more than a tabletop one was that I reallllly have some qualms about the whole thing. It's just so... worldly.

I'm going to try to think the best of the Gap people until I have evidence to believe otherwise, and I would *imagine* that they were trying to avoid exactly the kind of fight that AFA is picking. "Do whatever you want?" I would take that to mean that they don't care what you celebrate as long as you buy their stuff! They have families to support and care for, so go buy something. Hey, is your holiday in the list? "Whatever you wanukka" makes it a pretty broad list. They just want you to buy their stuff!

Now, what I was GOING to blog about was the fact that "do whatever you want" to ME is a very... um... ungodly sort of thing to start messing with with untold consequences, especially when you think of the interest on credit cards or what could happen if you did the wrong drug some night. Ok, back to holidays... I don't know that the Gap company is really advocating a hedonistic lifestyle. DO correct me if I'm wrong. I'm just of the opinion that maybe if we'd apply the same doctrinal tests to some of the crazy crap we sing on Sunday mornings in some churches that we'd have room to talk about a clothing store ad.

But NAZI??? If you don't like Christmas?? And... we Christians need to rigourously defend a Christianized Pagan holiday lest it get too... Pagan?? Am I crazy? Does this make ANY SENSE to you?

Man. I'm more than a little bewildered.

Tinkle Time.

This is a serious issue! I'm not kidding.

Now, when you have a budget crisis and you close rest stops on the highway, you present motorists with a genuine problem. I have to admit it isn't a biggie if you close rest stops in the middle of a city. Just pull off to the nearest McDonald's, go potty, wash your hands with antibacterial soap, grumble that there are no towels, use the hair dryer thingies and maybe grab a soda and off ya go.

But in the boonies where exits can be 20 miles apart... and even then, there are difficulties finding a bathroom because the one store in town closes after midnight... well, it's just wrong to do. At least give folks a designated place to pull over and poop in their own cars. But if I'm not mistaken, there are laws against public nudity. Ladies wearing pants are NOT going to be able to pee without a blanket tied 'round their waist and even then... it can be most soggily unpleasant. And can you imagine stopping suddenly and having "slosh problems?" Not to be gross and crude, but I'm thinking it has to happen somewhere, sometime.

Then again... that's the least of our worries. Now imagine yourself in the boonies driving and SUDDENLY RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU is a guy peeing by the side of the road. Don't tell me this couldn't happen, or that you would *never ever* be in danger of hitting the fellow. To my mind, rest stops are a public health and safety concern just like having police officers on the street.

And further... do you not think that if there is an outbreak of something contagious that can be transmitted by bowel movements or urine, that having people throw their ziplock baggies in the nearest Wal-Mart trash can might not be a problem? Or mowers hitting an occasional roadside bomb might not be more than a disgusting nuisance? You don't think cleaning that stuff up might actually cost MORE than leaving the rest stops open in more rural areas?

I guess what I'm asking for is some consistency. If you don't want to keep rest stops open, fine. I will have to go *somewhere,* and if McDonald's isn't available and I'm far from home, a ziplock bag it is. And public nudity? My not being able to wash my hands after? Deal with it.

Now... where are the politicians who approved of these closings? I want to shake their hands.

Thrift Store Finds.

D and I have been leaving children alone with Patrick and just going to thrift stores for fun a couple times a week. It gives Patrick a little extra money and it gives us a chance to *leave.* Everybody wins! Well, except G. G has been forced to come along on these incredibly boring excusions because we're jerks and unfair. The plus is that he can play his DS in the van to his heart's content, or he can come in and look around while we spend "hours and hours" looking at stuff.

I really should bring my camera on one of these outings. You wouldn't believe the stuff they're selling... which means you wouldn't believe the stuff people used to have in their homes until recently... Would you dress a four-year-old in a shirt with the words, "In your dreams..." on it? I might've if it had cute bears sleeping near puffy clouds or something, and not thought about the innuendo. But the glamour chick pictured on the T, complete with cleavage, and the shirt being one of those lace-up numbers... Well... What kinda sicko has "dreams" about a little kid??? I couldn't even see my way clear to donating such a thing if I received it as a gift for my child.

One really GREAT thing I found on my last trip was a pair of basketball shoes for G! Nikes, too. The pair we got seems to be an older version of this, because they don't sell the same kind any more. Product review also seems consistent, as the shoes are very heavy. I couldn't imagine running in them, but G was thrilled. They seem to be a bit more stylish than the stuff we usually buy for him at Kohl's or Wal-Mart. :] That was an outrageous $7.96, considering it's a thrift store. But ok. How often do you find really nice size 13s in decent colours and condition? So... there you go.

We also bought a pie plate that has a blueberry pie recipe and picture on it. D was surprised I spent a whole $3.48 on it. Yeah... that's not like me to spend that much. But I had been hoping to find something for pies for a long time. This is decorative, but you can bake in it as well. We made strawberry apple pie the next day in it (one can strawberry filling, mixed with one can apple). Emperor made a bit of a fuss about using the pie pan. "We're not making a blueberry pie!" he objected.

LOL. Emperor is not the most logical guy on the planet. He got Elf hesitant to use the pan as well. D came into the room later and said, "Why are you making that? That's not a blueberry pie!" Um... thanks a lot. Emperor talked to you, didn't he? No... and D also thinks that Emperor's objections to using the pie pan are perfectly logical.

Ah, well. The pie pan baked beautifully. Not a bit of pie burnt on the bottom or sides, but fully cooked. Who would get rid of a pie pan? Doesn't everyone use these almost weekly?

Naboth's Vineyard Part I

Who Speaks For Autistic People?

My mind goes round and round on this one. The medical professionals, who by and large are NOT disabled themselves, get to cobble together the DSM that spells out which problems are considered conditions and which are not. And it bothers me that it's starting to look as though Asperger's is going to be eliminated from the next edition.

Call me paranoid, but what if we just eliminated all the well-adjusted and verbal schizophrenics or dyslexics from their little DSM categories and left ONLY the ones who couldn't advocate for themselves or others? What kind of advocacy would the "real" disabled people be able to cobble together? You see where I'm going with this.

Now, I *totally* and completely get this idea that one person might not be "as disabled" as another. Or that maybe the person on the more functional end of the spectrum oughtn't qualify for aid when dollars are tight and we need to concentrate on those who are more severely affected. But the truth is that being autistic does not HAVE to mean life in an institution. It can. It doesn't HAVE to mean being "disconnected" from others. It can.

But you see, not only are we dealing with disability, we're also dealing with personality mixed in with the disability. Doctors and others, in diagnosing, have to tease out how one may affect the other in deciding who gets what label. And hey! I get that autistic folks generally may be more introverted as a group and that there's a fine line between "introverted and weird" and "disabled."

I have several children who manifest their disabilities in different ways. I would LIKE funding for my oldest autistic child who is unable to keep his thoughts to himself and/or can lose his temper royally. It's so way far beyond the "just teach the child to mind" category that it isn't even fair to comment upon. Suffice to say we are doing all we can. This child, without special help, will likely bounce from one low-paying job to another and have difficulty with his relationships. Even with special help, he's got some troubles. I'm truly sorry. I'm doing all I can for him. But eliminate the PDDs from the DSMs and we have a MESs.

Elfie McMelfie will likely just need a bit of sheltering. Please, no jury duty, as just the very thought that someone else isn't a Christian is enough to shock him to tears. The eternal Hell that awaits them is too frightening! (IMO that doesn't make for an impartial juror. I love him, and it's nice that he cares about people so deeply... and maybe more of us should... but just saying.) Please, no big crowds. No rock concerts. No putting any book on top of the Bible. Even anther Bible, unless it's the King James Version with no typos in it. You've been warned. Elf should be ok if people understand his quirks and let him work with a small group of folks doing the same thing each day. He will be ok with just a bit of understanding; he really will.

But Woodjie. Poor little guy needs LOTS of help! This fellow is leading me down a path I have never travelled. I am not sure how to help him. I do know he needs lots of help to succeed. I know he would probably want other autistic people who know a bit better about what life is like for him to speak for him rather than a doctor who sees him for 15 minutes. For that matter, I know that little fellow well and would be the very best advocate I can be for him... but I'm still Mommy. Still see him with the Mommy heart. Certainly if other people with the "autistic" label are advocating for autistics in general, it would be better for Woodjie.

Then again, too bad we have to have labels. Too bad we can't have a number and say well, Woodjie's life skills are at a 10 out of 100 (100 being typical three-year-old, going potty but needing help with snaps sort of thing). Then we could more closely advocate between labelled groups. Certainly my child has things in common with a Downs Syndrome child, and things NOT in common. But yet we seem to rally people in our own organizations without looking to the commonalities between conditions.

Where am I going with this? I don't know. Just wanted to chat with you today about the fact that having the more "functional" people losing the label soon probably will not bode well for those remaining. Probably it will reinforce stereotypes about autistic people as well.

If you have any thoughts on this, I'd like to hear them unless your surname happens to be "Savage."

Japan

Please read Emperor and Elf's blogs about Japan. Don't forget to feed the comment nuts!

They were given a stack of children's books last week and just told to go learn about it. Sometimes I'm crazy like that. It's interesting sometimes the things they pick up. Notice that World War II is not mentioned. I went back and looked at the kids' books and... it really isn't covered AT ALL.

I'm going to have to clue them in about that, but it was a rather messy and horrible end to a war. And yet it had to end. I know it's a rather sorrowful subject, but I would *think* that it would at least bear a mentioning in a book about Japan. My children were left with the impression that there were still plenty of Samurai and they'd like to see one.

Sometimes.

Sometimes I don't think I'm raising my older sons with a sense of seriousness and urgency about cleaning... let alone about cleaning to my satisfaction.

NEW Math Books!

I bought the sixth-grade Teaching Textbooks for use in our homeschool. It's a lot of fun! I would recommend getting the grade HIGHER than what you're starting now if you'd like to try it out (better yet, peruse the website, look at the tables of contents, allow your child to take a practice test and draw your own conclusions as to what is best for your child!). It says sixth grade on the cover, but I wouldn't get too excited about that part as much of the first quarter appears to be review. Place value and long division are re-covered in these first lessons. We have begun Singapore Math for our fifth grade studies, but I am using these Teaching Textbooks for our lesson about once a week. It slows us down a little bit, but I also figure that it's fun and it can't hurt to review on a weekly basis, or go over previously learned material in a new and different way.

I'd highly recommend getting this set, but I will warn you that it's a bit difficult to install. I finally had to resort to calling the company on my cell phone while I was at the computer doing this process. Hopefully, this review was helpful to someone thinking about purchasing math curriculum for a child. Teaching Textbooks are available through CBD as well as the company's own website for the *same* price, and shipping is included. I would advise against getting an extra workbook in the lower grades, however, as the answers to workbook pages are easily worked out on a scrap paper.